Happiness

I recently read an article in the Smith College Alumni Quarterly that totally captivated my attention. The article was called, The Happiness Paradox, by Andrea Cooper, and was focused on women and happiness (what defined happiness to various women). The article took into consideration factors and other questions such as a woman’s self-pressure to feel or be happy; “….. [Are] intelligent, compassionate, often overworked women [expected) to feel happy all the time? …… Is happiness something to be pursued?”

I often think about my own happiness and am happy to say that I really am happy most of the time! I can’t say that I felt that way in my childhood or my teen years (who did?) …. Or even my 20’s and 30’s. However, I think those years for, most part are a rollercoaster of self-discovery and struggle sprinkled with moments of happiness. Now however, I feel happy as a whole, which means the peaks and valleys of unhappiness are just not there. That’s not to say for instance, if I lost my partner, or a family member, or found out I had cancer that I would not go into a period of great sadness or despair. I would, for sure. The question for me would be, would I be able to rebound and create or re-create a state of happiness?  I see happiness as something that has to be created .... as in I create my own happiness by the choices I make and those experiences I choose to absorb, tune into and pay attention to (such as taking in an amazing sun-rise from the field accross our street or getting on the floor and playing with our dogs).


I consider myself a very resilient person. I don’t know where that quality came from but in my case I think my resilience and happiness are partly inherited. I also consider myself, for the most part, to be an optimist. I don’t do well when surrounded by negative energy …. my internal chemistry changes and my body absorbs it. I have made choices in my life during the past several years to avoid negative energy. My father has always been the eternal optimist. This is a guy who started his own business from scratch with a small amount of money. He ran for mayor …and lost. He was a talented runner who ran every day at lunchtime. He got hit by a car during a run in the early 90’s, lost a leg, had severe brain trauma (to the point where he had trouble putting a simple puzzle together) and went on to make a full recovery. He kept a pair of running shoes in his closet for years, thinking he might be able to run again one day. He never complained about his injuries or accident. He just went on. He rides his bike just about everyday – as long as he can workout, he’s a happy camper. I get that. My mother, although she passed when I was young from her own personal period of despair, had such a bubbly personality and the most upbeat voice – it will always and forever be remembered in my head. I consider myself to be lucky. I feel I am in a state of homeostasis, meaning all realms of my life right now are aligned and balanced. Certainly the ways I manage to create and balance my life differs from someone else. I will say that exercise plays a big role in my ability to balance aspects of my life.  I'm a better partner, more productive worker, better listener and all around happier camper thanks to exercise.  How happy would I be if I could not exercise?


I’d like to share some of the quotes from various women from the happiness article. I found them all to be totally inspiring and wanted to pass them on to inspire anyone who is reading this blog. Read and maybe question your own happiness;


“The more comfortable you are with yourself, the more you define your own happiness.” – Annie Mortia


“To be happy …. You want to be doing things and not over-thinking.” – Smith Professor, Peake


“Little things that make her happy usually involve a physical component coupled with some sort of indulgence, like hiking all morning and stopping for blueberry pancakes on the way home.” – Dawn Dill


“…. life is such a combination of threats and opportunities …. If we’re not resilient, we will fall.”   
  -Barbara Becker Holstein (speaking on resilience).


“…. practicing gratitude and mindful awareness of what we can have can bring about happiness…”  - Peggie Gillespie


“Happy is always thrust into a future that never comes. We truly only have now. Now is where our power is.” – Sheila Steplar


“…. Happiness may not lie in what happens to you but in how you respond.” – Lynne Thomas

Working Out by Feel

I spent several years of my life "in training" for the sport of running. I also dabbled in cycling and was eventually led to the sport of triathlon.  I took a brief gander at some of my old logs from the 90's when I was in full on triathlon training mode.  The logs noted tallies for each week in individual hours of running, cycling, swimming, yoga and strength training. I also tallied what percentage I spent in each HR zone during each phase of the year.  Crazy.  I'd average 15-23 hours of training per week .... and I was a minimalist compared to the other pro triathletes. I have notes upon notes of my training, how I was feeling, goals, etc ..... I can't imaging putting in those hours now, nor do I have the desire. 


I no longer keep a log on a regular basis, although I have for a period of months when gearing up for a half IM event in recent years. Of course I encourage my athletes to keep a log not only for their review, but for mine as well. Often times we can see patterns or trends that lead to great performances .... or sometimes illness (getting run down).  It's also a reality check of consistency of training and volume.  These days, I train by feel and by listening to what my body and spirit needs. Sounds corny, I know.  There has been a bit of a shift in my approach to my own training .... which has become more "fitness" based.  My motivation to workout has nothing to do with a race schedule or performances.  I workout purely to feel good, move my body and nurture my spirit.


One of my top 5 all-time workouts, occurred recently while I was in NJ, and now officially what I call my home away from home. Who would have thought I'd become a Jersey girl?  I am happy to say that I firmly believe that my achilles tear that has plagued me for over a year is finally and officially mended!  With that being said, I am very tentative with running these days to avoid any set-backs.  Heck, after months and months of no running, what's the rush to get back into it?  My recent run workouts have been more a combination of walking and jogging.  I have yet to go out for a full on run ... and frankly, I'm scared to do so even though my heel will probably be fine.  My top 5 workout consisted of a 7 minute walk to the boardwalk followed by another 3 minutes once I hit the boardwalk. I then alternated 5 minutes of jogging with 5 minutes of brisk walking.  It was cold outside however the sun was shining and I was able to stay close to the boardwalk shops and feel the heat of that sun.  I spent one hour of jogging and walking while looking at an amazing ocean view (much like the picture).  I was the only one on that boardwalk with the exception of one or two other walkers, some just out walking with coffee.  I did not care about pace or heart rate.  It was all easy but it felt so good to move and breathe that fresh ocean air. In this case, as with many of my workouts lately, the goal has been to just move in whatever way feels good. Sometimes it's in working out with weights, sometimes it's just walking (or walking and jogging combined), sometimes it's getting in the pool and swimming long, but easy. I put in a couple of 3000y workouts lately and was in the moment of each lap versus thinking about what came next or how many more yards remained of the workout.  I workout once per day, usually getting in 45 min to an hour or exercise. I mountained biked with friends a few weeks ago, spending 90 minutes or so on completely wooded, single track, mostly up or downhill terrain. It was a blast .... pure joy and a great workout. 

I've been tired for the past several months for reasons that I can't really explain but can say it has to do with some changes going on in my body.  I'm in the process of having things checked out and figured out.  So, my motivation to TRAIN, is almost non-existent however my motivation to EXERCISE is a constant.  I choose my workouts based on what feels good that day or what my spirit needs.  If I've been in a negative environment or been in situations or conversations that drain my own energy, my spirit needs fresh air and time alone.  If I'm feeling like I want to work hard and really sweat, I'll get it out in my own spin class, or take a class. Sometimes a brisk walk with the dogs serves as my workout (they walk fast). 

I did my one hour walk/jog workout again on Christmas morning.  I read an article in the local paper about a 53 year old guy who has made it a tradition to surf every Christmas morning. He's been doing it for years. I set out to look for him .... and I found him out there in the ocean waiting for a good "ride."  My guess is that surfing fuels his spirit and being out there alone, in the cold water on Christmas morning served as his spiritual ritual. Something that is very personal to him.  

My recent "shift" in how I view my workouts seems to encompass just that .... each, if not most workouts serve as something personal. Today, I'll go out for a walk in the snow with the wind whipping around. There is something about being out there in the elements that brings renewed energy.  I can't say if or when my motivation to TRAIN for races will make an appearance. My guess is that it probably will for a short period of time this summer.  For now, I enjoy "exercising."  It's a joy I'll never take for granted!

A Poem For Spring from Debbie Woodbury (my sister)

A Poem for Spring- with love from Debbie

It starts with light
lingering longer each day
Reminding us that
cold and dark are moving on
that hope and renewal
appear each day in nature’s offerings
Clues we need only observe

Snow recedes
Pungent, mud smell of thawing earth
fills us with the giddiness of spring
The belief that anything is possible

Crocuses magically appear around the front yard maple tree
then suddenly,
from within the matted tangle of the still-dormant cattails
comes the blessed sound
of peepers.

Peepers!
What conductor signaled this overture?
Who decided that today would be THE day
to announce the precious return
of this reassuring symphony?

The mingling of welcome music with the
happy conversation of the chickadee
playfully hopping from perch to perch at the feeder
ceaselessly chattering, “Chicka dee dee dee!”
too busy to stop and rest

Song of the robin
a rich rising and falling of notes
“cheer up, cheer up cheer up,” she croons
while hopping along the ground,
grabbing juicy earthworms to fill her red round belly

Each day a new gift
Forsythia, daffodil, tulip
the poking out of brown earth and barren branch to reveal
Something green
Something hopeful
Something precious
Spring.~To my boys on Easter~

A Little Steam Room Etiquette Please!

I sometimes have to think a bit about whether or not I should blog about certain subjects because I know there are people out there who read this blog that see me in a professional light. Today's blog is a questionable one, but I can't resist because the hair on my arms (at least what I can find) is still up.

One of the big draws to the local athletic facility where I work out is the steam and sauna rooms that are attached to the women's locker room. The men have both in there locker room as well. I'm drawn to this place because of the pool and because I grew up using this facility (including some day care programs when I was 3 and 4 years old). So there is a bit of nostalgia going on here.

I'm not a sauna or steam room kind of person and I wasn't sure why until my recent experience in the steam room really nailed the hammer on the head. I thought I'd start treating myself to a steam when I got out of the pool to relax a bit and sweat out some of the chlorine from my body. The winter air has been dry and I also figured some moist heat would be good for my skin. I put in one of my longest swims in a while and was looking forward to a relaxing steam. I felt a bit tight so couldn't be a better time! So, into the steam room I went with my bathing suit, flip flops on, a towel to put beneath me, and my water bottle. Of course, it was dark and steamy in there. I noticed a figure to the left side as I walked in so I sat on the right side bench, closed my eyes and tried to get into a relaxing zone. The steam started to gradually ease up (just a little) and the women across from me said; "It's really warm." Well, I opened my eyes for a split second and there she was literally butt naked because she in the yoga plow position. It wasn't the nakedness that shocked me, it was the plow position. Okay, that's not cool with me but apparently she seemed to feel totally relaxed doing her stretch routine, naked, with no towel on or underneath her. What was more frightening was that I knew her (not well, but has been an acquaintance for years) and would never guess that she'd be in THERE doing THAT. I went back to focusing on my breath but it did not last long because the suction sound of water under what had to be her butt as she moved snapped me out of my zone. I decided that I was out of there after she transferred into a seated quad stretch. What was next? The pigeon pose? A headstand? I was waiting for the "ooooohhhhmmmmmmss" to begin.

Look, maybe it's me that has the issue. Obviously it is. I recall using the steam room in the past and having the same kind of experiences (however there were no yoga poses) and feeling, well ... a bit uncomfortable. Clearly my issue. Folks, we are not in the privacy of our own home so I don't really want to know what you might do at home if you had your own private steam room. This is a public place. Can't we all just sit there, covered with a towel at least, and sweat? The stretching room is just down the hall from the locker rooms. Maybe take a steam and then go there to work on yoga.

I've been a bit on edge this week. Not sleeping, working a lot, trying to squeeze in some of my own workouts and not refilling my own "chill" tank enough. Looks like the steam room is out for me as a form of relaxing. Gee, I don't dare try the sauna!

Sweet Pea

Sweet Pea: June 16, 1997-May 17, 2009

Sweet Pea

Licker of our salty, worked out legs and face

Silly Pea, who squirmed on her back like a pot-bellied piglet

Lab impersonator, carrying sticks up the driveway

Office companion - all day, everyday companion

Enthusiastic Greeter each time we walked in the door

Sensitive girl, all knowing, tuned into our emotions

Sun Goddess

Lawn ornament

Expert at begging

The one who farted out loud

The one who tripped down the stairs

The one who chased the bunnies and squirrels without luck of catching

The one who fell into the pool chasing the skimmer net

The one who scratched on the side of bed every morning at 5am like clockwork, asking to cuddle under the sheets

Loved her "walkies"

Loved her "cookies"

Loved red wine

Loved us .... unconditionally

Touched our hearts

Top Tips for Choosing a Partner .... training partner that is.

Sound like a topic out of Redbook or Self Magazine?? Well, I'm talking about making training partner choices here. I am one of those that has always surrounded myself with people to train with. The thought came to mind after organizing a fun group training session at my house today (picture is of a few of the folks that came). Our levels of fitness were somewhat varied, but it did not matter, we were all on our trainers and I had everyone's HR ranges right in front of me so I could keep tabs on folks. We were able to work together but stay within our individual HR zones.

I have my workouts that I like to hit "solo" depending on my mood or the workout (all depends on how much thinking I've got to do). However, there is nothing like having the support of training buddies. I was very, very fortunate to have a core group of wonderful folks to train with when I was racing as a professional triathlete. As I write this, I feel like sending them all a thank you card for just being there, even during those really tough days. I know, that they also gained a lot from training as a group.

With that being said, you can either BENEFIT, or SINK yourself depending on the folks you choose to surround yourself with on easy, moderate or hard days. I say the choice is yours because ultimately, you are and should be in control of your workout. So, here are my top tips:

1) Training partners need to have a mutual respect for each others training goals. Talk about and agree upon the effort and objective before you head into the workout.

2) Try to hook up with folks who understand that an easy day means EASY! There are those individuals out there who always start pushing the envelope. You know the type .... the one who picks up the pace during the last mile or two of a run. The one who always picks up the effort when going up a hill on the bike .... or the run for that matter! There is one guy who occasionally swims at the same time as I do at the YMCA who ALWAYS wants to share a lane with me or swim in the lane next to me. No prob ... he's a nice guy but is always "racing me." I could be doing kicking drills on my side, and he's splashing away (yes, he's a splasher) right next to me! He's not my training partner, but he seems to want think that we are training together. I just shut off the fact that he's next to me. It's a good skill to have. Also, never be afraid to speak up during a workout if someone starts pushing during an easy training session. I do it all of the time! It's all about "keeping folks honest!"

3) During easy days, try to find training partners who are at the same level or even a bit slower than you so that you stay true to the goal of going easy.

4) During hard interval sessions or time trial efforts, try to find training partners who are slightly stronger or at the same level as you so that you stay true to the goal of challenging yourself. A nice way to organize recovery efforts during intervals, is to circle back and pick up those who might be slightly behind. In swimming, determine a send off time that is fair for everyone (assuming everyone is close to the same level).

5) Know what you are getting into when joining group training sessions! We have a local cycling club (NCC Cycling and Triathlon Club - http://www.nohobikeclub.org/) that has occasional evening and weekend group rides. Many of the rides are challenging and I know what I am getting into when I show up. I know my heart rate will be above threshold for several sections of the ride. I also know that I can choose to go on a more "mellow" ride if I choose. Why? I have researched the group and understand the intensity levels of the rides. If you are unsure, bring a buddy that you know you can hang with if things get dicey. Better yet, create your own group ride with those who are at your level of fitness. There are certainly times when you need to GO FOR IT and step outside your comfort box ... and that may mean showing up with the big dogs for a time trial or hard group ride. Just make calculated decisions as to when you are going to do it. This is what I love about NCC. They have time trials (hills and flats) and anyone of any level can show up and give it a try. It's all about you, the road. and your watch. Not anyone else.

6) BIG EGOS mean BIG TROUBLE. Try to choose training partners that are not afraid to encourage. It's always nice to finish a workout with someone and say "GREAT JOB" to each other. Or, "Man, I was tired, but you pulled me through today, thanks!"

7) Try to choose training partners that have a sense of humor. Makes things fun. Can you imagine being serious ALL OF THE TIME when you train with people? Nothing like a good stride stopp'in belly laugh on a run!

8) Be clear on your own training objectives and don't get swayed into training with "hammer heads" on a continual basis. There's a time for that as I noted in #4

With that being said, I'm going to go for awalk with my dog. I know she'll be a good sport and keep it easy!